Salocin

Non-Dairy Creamer

Wharton went to Beach Week in Miami - 400+ soon-to-be-ex-students descended on two hotels on South Beach and we had a great time - I'll write about it one day.

But on the plane back from Miami, I was served what will remain indelibly etched on my memory as the worst cup of coffee of my entire life (American Airlines, in case you were wondering). It came in a styrofoam cup, which is a bad sign to start with, was sort of see-through and had clearly remained on a hot plate for hours.

What really ruined the coffee, however, was the milk substitute it came with. N'Joy Brand Non-Dairy Creamer. With a cute heart instead of an apostrophe - marketing 101, bring it on.

Ingredients: Corn Syrup solids, partially hydrogenated soybean and/or canola oils, sodium caseinate (a milk derivative), dipotassium phosphate, sodium silicoaliminate, artificial colors, mono- and di-glycerides, soy lecithin, artifical flavors.

This thin white powder turns your coffee white, and then all those funky little chemicals do heaven-only-knows-what to your digestion.

You might wonder why they don't just use milk, but then you read the hidden advantages of N'Joy Brand Non-Dairy Creamer on the Sugar Foods Corporation website :

Holding: Liquefied, it holds for hours at room temperature, and for days under refrigeration. Storage: Stores dry without spoilage, waste or leakage. Cost: Costs a fraction of dairy products.

So when you next see an advertisement with a couple of cute girls sporting white smudges above their upper lips, and the question "Got Milk" hanging in the air somewhere, remember that in American Airlines, and probably most other major carriers, the milk is about as real as the white makeup they're wearing to create the smudge.

Funny also was the warning below : Caution: List all powedered products this product should not be stored or uesde near an open flame or high heat source. So it's flammable or explosive, artificial, full of preservatives, costs almost nothing, and found in abundance on aircraft. Delightful.

Posted by nlvp at May 14, 2004 02:34 PM