Salocin

hey, this joke I crafted when my it was my daughter's day to tell a joke in her class:

teacher asked sheila, "what you ate in breakfast?", Sheila says "I ate 6 fish". Teacher, why are you eating so much fish these days. Sheila "cuz I am tyring to learn swimming!!!"

my addy is irfanzia AT yahoo.com

Poem: Eye Halve a Spelling Chequer

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect in it's weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.

BTW - cool site, love the format ;)

Did you hear the one about the plasic surgeon?

He hung himself!

Great site!

Thanks for the opportunity for the GMAIL account!

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less

NOW --------

Enough of that crap . . .

The donkey later came back and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected, and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you do something wrong and try to cover your ass, it always comes back to bite you.

well there were 3 cuples who wanted to become part of the church...an elderly cuple, a mid age cuple and newly weds.....the pastor told each cuple that if they wanted to get in they would have to not have sex for 2 weeks..they all agreed...2 weeks later they are all at the church. the pastor asks the elderly cuple how it went..they said " went great wasnt a problem at all" so he said ok ur in the church. then he asked the mid aged cuple and they replied " it was tough the first week but we managed" so the pastor said welcome to our church. finally he asked the newlyweds... they answered " it was goin great till she dropped the paint" dropped the paint? asked the pastor..the husband siad "yes she dropped the paint and when she bent over i had to have her right then and there...the pastor said o it seems ur not allowed into our church..the husband replied " o its ok, we arent allowed in Home Depot either"

so there is this old man and he tells this old lady its his birthday. she put her hand in his pants and starts feeling around and then says. your 86 years old and the old man says hiw did youknow that and she said you told me yesterday.

Hey can you send me an invitte at montez265@yahoo.com

Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50."

The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100."

The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!"

Pl. email me some email addresses from U.K and India and Pakistan